Author's posts
What’s With All The Feathers?
A female reporter, interviewing an American Indian chief, asked the significance of the varied number of feathers in Indian headdresses. “Feathers show number of sexual partners,” the chief replied. Indicating a nearby young brave, he continued, “Him? One woman, one feather. Him?” pointing to a second, older man, “Three women, three feathers.” The reporter looked …
Vive la France
This happened to an Englishman in France who was totally drunk. The French policeman stops his car and asks the gentleman if he has been drinking. With great difficulty, the Englishman admits that he has been drinking all day, that his daughter got married in the morning to a French man, and that he drank …
Walking on the Grass
The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands. The instructor said, “Ladies, remember that exercise is good for you. Walking is especially beneficial. It strengthens the pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier. Just pace yourself, make plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft surface like grass or …
Snow on the Mountains in Japan
Driving on 246 highway toward Atsugi City in Japan you can see a light dusting of snow on the mountains.
The Man Who Gave up Sex for Golf
A golfer is in a competitive match with a friend, who is ahead by a couple of strokes. “Boy, I’d give anything to sink this putt,” the golfer mumbles to himself. Just then, a stranger walks up beside him and whispers, “Would you be willing to give up one-fourth of your sex life?” Thinking the …
A Political Paws: Pelosi, Reid, and the Unlikely Texas Tale
Nancy Pelosi called Harry Reid into her office one day and said, “Harry, I have a plan to win back the hearts of voters in Middle America in 2014!” “Great Nancy, but how?” asked Harry. “We’ll get some cheap, tacky clothes and shoes, like most Middle Class Americans wear, then stop at the animal shelter …
Do Elephants Remember?
In 1972, Joe Miller was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Tulsa Junior College. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Joe approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants …
Texas State Police Are Cracking Down on Speeders
The Texas State Police are cracking down on speeders heading into Dallas. For the first offense, they give you 2 Dallas Cowboy tickets. If you get stopped a second time, they make you use them. Q. What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl? A. The Dallas Cowboys Q. How …
Male Logic: Critical Thinking At Its Best!
Woman: Do you drink beer? Man: Yes. Woman: How many beers a day? Man: Usually about 3 Woman: How much do you pay per beer? Man: $5.00 which includes a tip (This is where it gets scary !) Woman: And how long have you been drinking? Man: About 20 years, I suppose. Woman: So a …
Bar Room Logic
If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let’s all get wasted together and have the time of our lives. Armand’s Pizza, Washington, DC Fighting for peace is like Screwing for virginity. The Bayou, Baton Rouge, LO No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick …
The Amazing WD-40
I had a neighbor who bought a new pickup. I got up very early one Sunday morning and saw that someone had spray painted red all around the sides of this beige truck (for some unknown reason). I went over, woke him up, and told him the bad news. He was very upset and was …
Christmas Lights
This Is Why I Don’t Put Christmas Lights On A Palm Tree.
Matsumoto Castle, Japan
Went to Matsumoto Castle located in Nagano Prefecture on the Island of Honshu, Japan. This was quite the experience and it was spectacular to be able to see the castle both on the inside and out, but also the panoramic views of the mountains and the city that was built long after the castle. Some …
Sights Along the Drive From Tokyo to Nagano
Took a drive in Japan from Tokyo to Nagano today and took some photos along the way. Some of the mountains that you can see are the Minami Alps. I got a couple shots of some cars. The views along the drive were very nice and so was the experience.
Fine, I’ll Wait
A seriously depressed woman stands at the edge of a cliff, trying to get the nerve up to jump. A passing hobo stops and says, “since you’re about to kill yourself anyway, would you mind if we had sex first?” The woman said “Hell no … get away from me!” The bum turned to leave …
Nagano Ninja Village
I have heard about a ninja village near Nagano, Japan so I decided to check it out. This was a pretty cool place because they had everything you could imagine from trap doors, to ninja star throwing, blow dart shooting, and all sorts of obstacles. They even had some water obstacles. The cool part of …
Eight Words with two Meanings
1. THINGY (thing-ee) n. Female…… Any part under a car’s hood. Male….. The strap fastener on a woman’s bra. 2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj. Female…. Fully opening up one’s self emotionally to another. Male….. Playing football without a cup. 3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n. Female… The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one’s partner. Male… Leaving …
An Island is Born
A yacht was traveling in the south Pacific when the crew came across a weird sight. Look at these photos and try to imagine the thrill of experiencing this phenomenon. A BEACH? NO!!!!This is not a beach; it is volcanic stones floating on the water. WHERE IS THE VOLCANO? UNBELIEVABLE SITE, SO TAKE PICTURES NO …
Find the Cat
What a mess? Can you find the cat in this photo?
Case Closed
Women always say that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts. Here is proof that they are wrong. A year or so after giving birth a woman will often say “it might be nice to have another kid”. You never hear a guy say ” I would like …
Side Effect
A golfer was involved in a terrible car crash and was rushed to the hospital. Just before he was put under, the surgeon popped in to see him. “I have some good news and some bad news,” says the surgeon. “The bad news is that I have to remove your right arm!” “Oh God no!” …
New Chevy
I stopped by the Chevrolet Dealership yesterday, for a look at the new Silverado 1500 pickup. Just for fun, I took it out for a test drive. I wanted to sense that new “feel” before they become extinct. The salesman (a black man wearing an Obama “change” lapel pin) sat in the passenger seat describing …
Old Man Scam **Beware**
Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the mall and in dark parking lots, etc. This one caught me totally by surprise. This is a warning for all men and I wanted to pass it on in case you haven’t heard about it. It’s a ‘heads up’ for those older men who may be …
Idiot Sightings
I handed the teller at my bank a withdrawal slip for $400.00 . I said “May I have large bills, please”? She looked at me and said “I’m sorry sir; all the bills are the same size.” When I got up off the floor I explained it to her. Columbus, OH. When my husband and …
Chinese Restaurant
A couple goes for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and orders the “Chicken Surprise.” The waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron pot. Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around before the …
