Author's posts
The Michigan Wife
Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties. The first man had married a woman from Ohio and had told her that she was going to do the dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple of days, but on the third day he came home to see …
Disposition of Sensitive Information
[Abstract] The purpose of this document is to provide a summary of the article entitled “Disposition Of Sensitive Automated Information” as the author understands this article. Also included within this document is an explanation of how disk encryption can help to protect the information on that disk in the event it was lost or stolen. …
Wine vs. Water
To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine… and those who don’t: As Ben Franklin said: In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end …
Spanish Words of the Day
1. Cheese The teacher told Pepito to use the word cheese in a sentence. Pepito Replies: ‚ÄúMaria likes me, but cheese fat.‚Äù 2. Mushroom When all of my family get in the car, there’s not mushroom. 3. Shoulder My fren wanted to become a citizen but she didn’t know how to read so I shoulder. …
Oil Change Instructions
Oil Change instructions for Women: 1.) Drive into Ultra Tune when the odometer reaches 10,000 kilometres since the last oil change. 2.) Drink a cup of coffee , read free paper. 3.) 15 minutes later, write a cheque and leave with a properly maintained vehicle. Money spent: Oil Change: $40.00 Coffee: $2.00 Total: $42.00 Oil …
Financial Institutions Handle Privacy
[Abstract] The purpose of this document is to analyze why many financial institutions assess privacy as a compliance issue as opposed to a risk management issue. Included within this document are two different current regulations to help consumers protect their privacy. Also included within this document is an example of the primary causes of network …
Top Seven Idiots of 2008
Number One Idiot of 2008 I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her …
A Heartwarming Story
A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, “I’ve lost my grandpa!” ‘The cop asked, ‘What’s he like?’ The little boy hesitated for a moment and then replied, “Crown Royal whiskey and women with big tits.”
Retired Sailor
An old retired sailor puts on his old uniform and heads to the docks once more for old times’ sake. He engages a prostitute and takes her up to a room. He’s soon going at it as well as he can for a guy his age, but needing some reassurance, he asks, “How am I …
Penis Research
The American Government funded a study to see why the head of a man’s penis was larger than the shaft. After 1 year and $180,000, they concluded that the reason that the head was larger than the shaft was to give the man more pleasure during sex. After the US published the study, the French …
A Dog’s Intuition
Have you ever heard that a dog ‘knows’ when an earthquake is about to hit? Have you ever heard that a dog can ‘sense’ when a tornado is stirring up, even 20 miles away? Do you remember hearing that before the December tsunami struck Southeast Asia, dogs started running frantically away from the seashore, at …