It’s good to stop and smell the roses from time to time. I saw this flower sitting there in bloom and I knew I had to snap a photo to capture it’s beauty.
Funny Sign Slogan
SIGN IN A SHOE REPAIR STORE:
“We will heel you, We will save your sole, We will even dye for you.”
A SIGN ON A BLINDS AND CURTAIN TRUCK:
” Blind man driving.”
Sign over a Gynecologist’s Office:
“Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”
In a Podiatrist’s office:
“Time wounds all heels.”
At an Optometrist’s Office :
“If you don’t see what you’re looking for, You’ve come to the right place.”
On a Plumber’s truck :
“We repair what your husband fixed.”
On another Plumber’s truck :
“Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”
At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :
“Invite us to your next blow out.”
On an Electrician’s truck :
“Let us remove your shorts.”
In a Non-smoking Area:
“If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and will take appropriate action.”
On a Maternity Room door :
“Push. Push. Push.”
At a Car Dealership :
“The best way to get back on your feet – miss a car payment.”
Outside a Muffler Shop:
“No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”
In a Veterinarian’s waiting room :
“Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”
At the Electric Company:
“We would be delighted if you would pay your bill.
You will be delighted if you don’t.”
In a Restaurant window:
“Don’t stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”
In the front yard of a Funeral Home :
“Drive carefully. We’ll wait…”
At a Propane Filling Station:
“Thank Heaven for little grills.”
In a Chicago Radiator Shop:
“Best place in town to take a leak.”
Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
“Caution – This Truck is full of Political Promises.”
Photo Inside Google’s Data Center Mechanical Room
Inside one of Google’s data center Mechanical Systems.
Last Ride on My Harley
While riding my Harley, I swerved to avoid hitting a deer, lost control and landed in a ditch, severely banging my head.
Dazed and confused I crawled out of the ditch to the edge of the road when a shiny new convertible pulled up with a very beautiful woman who asked, “Are you okay?”
As I looked up, I noticed she was wearing a low cut blouse with cleavage to die for…
“I’m okay I think,” I replied as I pulled myself up to the side of the car to get a closer look.
She said, “Get in and I’ll take you home so I can clean and bandage that nasty scrape on your head.”
“That’s nice of you,” I answered, “but I don’t think my wife will like me doing that!”
“Oh, come now, I’m a nurse,” she insisted. “I need to see if you have any more scrapes and then treat them properly.”
Well, she was really pretty and very persuasive. Being sort of shaken and weak, I agreed, but repeated, “I’m sure my wife won’t like this.”
We arrived at her place which was just few miles away and, after a couple of cold beers and the bandaging, I thanked her and said, “I feel a lot better but I know my wife is going to be really upset so I’d better go now.”
“Don’t be silly!” she said with a smile. “Stay for a while. She won’t know anything. By the way, where is she?”
“Still in the ditch with the Harley, I guess.”
Bavarian Town Built in 14 Million Year Old Meteor Impact Crater.
Bavarian town of Noerdlinger built in a 14 million year old meteor impact crater.
Happy Halloween 2019
Happy Halloween 2019!
A Teaching Moment
The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class,”Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?”
No one answered so the teacher was about to pick on a random student. Little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth graders a question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”
Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”
Little Mary’s mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, “Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!”
The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, “Anybody?”
Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, “The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.”
Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued.
“As for you, young lady, I have three things to say:
One, you have a dirty mind,
Two, you didn’t read your homework,
And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”