Tag: testicles
How To Catch A Bear
A man in Michigan ‘s Upper Peninsula wakes up one morning to find a bear on his roof. So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough..there’s an ad for “Up North Bear Removers.” He calls the number and the bear remover says he’ll be over in 30 minutes. The bear remover arrives and …
Testicle Therapy
Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman …
Scottish Diplomacy
The following is a true bit of Scottish Diplomacy:……….One thing about blokes from Scotland is that their hearts and humour are always in the right place! Jimmy MacDonald, a City Councillor from Glasgow , was asked on a local live radio talk show just what he thought about the allegations of torture of suspected terrorists. …
Coffee and Testicles
A guy goes to the Nv. State High way Dept. to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, “Are you allergic to anything?” He replies, “Yes, caffeine. I can’t drink coffee.” “Ok, Have you ever been in the military service?” “Yes,” he says, “I was in Iraq for one tour.” The interviewer says, “That …
Banking on a Bet: The Curious Case of Round Testicles and Square Bets
An elderly woman walked into the Bank of Canada one morning with a purse full of money. She wanted to open a savings account and insisted on talking to the president of the Bank because, she said, she had a lot of money. After many lengthy discussions (after all, the client is always right) an …
Children Writing About the Ocean
1) – This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly, age 6) 2) – Oysters’ balls are called pearls. (Jerry, age 6) 3) – If you are surrounded by ocean, you are an island. If you don’t Have ocean all round you, you are incontinent. (, age 7) 4) – Sharks …
2nd Opinion
Joe had suffered from really bad headaches for the last 20 years. He eventually decided to go and see a doctor. The doctor said, ‘Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press …
Bear Removal
A man wakes up one morning to find a bear on his roof. So he looks in the yellow pages and sure enough, there’s an ad for ‘Bear Removers.’He calls the number, and the bear remover says he’ll be over in 30 minutes.The bear remover arrives, and gets out of his van. He’s got a …
Stun Gun
Pocket Taser Stun Gun, a great gift for the wife. A guy who purchased his lovely wife a pocket Taser for their anniversary submitted this : Last weekend I saw something at Larry’s Pistol & Pawn Shop that sparked my interest. The occasion was our 22nd anniversary and I was looking for a little something …
Government Job
A guy goes to the U.S. Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, “Have you been in the service?” “Yes,” he says. “I was in Vietnam for three years”. The interviewer says, “That will give you extra points toward employment” and then asks, “Are you disabled in any way?” The guy …
Are they?
A man is lying in bed in a Catholic hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young auxiliary nurse appears to sponge his face and hands. “Nurse,” he mumbles from behind the mask, “Are my testicles black?” Embarrassed the young nurse replies, “I don”t know, I”m only here to wash your face and …